The importance of speaking with sincerity, humility and wisdom in our daily lives
Speech is a faculty most of us are born with. Most can speak as much or as little as they want, thanks to this God-given ability and it would seem, in general, people have become so accustomed to it that they fail to take Into account the importance of speech.
Being able to speak is undoubtedly a blessing and Allah has granted this ability for a specific purpose. On the day of judgement, everyone will be held responsible for every word they have uttered. Almighty Allah has gifted humans with intelligence that they might believe in His greatness; as also eyes for them to see and appreciate the sublimity of that which He created; ears that they would listen to His verses being recited and tongue for them to exalt His glory and communicate His message.
The best way of speaking is speaking in all instances with the use of one’s conscience, in the knowledge that Allah is present, that His knowledge is all-encompassing and that, on the Day of judgement, all will be called to account in His presence.
Speaking in an Islamic way is possible only by submitting oneself to Allah and the message of the Quran. After fully experiencing faith in one’s heart, as well as sincerity and a sense of submission, one will come to recognize that it is Allah who grants speech. As long as people are not sincere in faith in their hearts, they will not be able to achieve sincerity in their speech through superficial means, such as, by simply paying attention to their words. To be able to speak in an Islamic way it is necessary to live all the time with a faith and consciousness of Allah in one’s heart.
One of the defining characteristics of a person is his/her way of speaking. A person is judged generally by what he/she says and is taken into account to determine his/her level of innocence or culpability, intelligence etc. A job interview is a good example of this because employers often judge the level of efficiency, personality, and job suitability and they depend mostly on the face-to-face discussion which they think is the most convenient way of selecting the right candidate for the job.
One of the primary characteristics is speaking with the awareness that the life of the world is transitory. Those who deify worldly things employ a way of speaking peculiar to themselves. It can be discerned from their speech that they have made the life of this world the major object of their longing. Out of ignorance of the truth of this worldly life as well of the afterlife, while, in the Qur’an, Allah tells us that the blessings of this world are to test people. Because they know that the true and lasting life is the one in the Hereafter, the faithful strive throughout their worldly lives to attain the abode of Paradise. They desire worldly blessings, like wealth and property, only to use them in a way that is pleasing to Allah, to show their gratitude to Him, and to exalt Him. Because of this moral excellence, even if they lose one such worldly blessing or even all their possessions, they do not give way to sorrow or despair. They consider it to be predestined by Allah, and they want Allah to give them the real blessings and finer things of the Hereafter.
Speaking with wisdom represents the ability to speak in the most appropriate, most beneficial and most effective manner possible. But speaking with wisdom is not bound by any specific rules. It depends on the time, place, the person addressed, and the circumstances. Moreover, the ability to speak with wisdom has no relation whatsoever with people’s degree of intelligence, how cultured they may be, their level of education or technical expertise. Some, who fail to apprehend this truth, then take part in courses or training to attain wisdom and public speaking skills.
When speaking with someone, those endowed with wisdom do not seek to endear the other to themselves. Knowing that it is Allah Who grants the power of speech, they take refuge in Him and employ their speech in order only to gain His approval. At all times, they are aware that, while they are speaking, they are in the presence, not only of other people, but of Allah, and that their words will be effective only by His will. To this purpose, that their language take effect and be supported with wisdom, they pray to Allah. As a consequence of their sincerity, their conscience assists them to choose those words which are best and the most appropriate. As such, all who listen to their consciences may easily discern that which needs emphasis, what needs to be indicated, or what must be said.
One of the manners of speech which is the most effective is that which is sincere, because, as with wise words, sincere speech attains the heart and conscience of the listener directly. It is in a human being’s nature to be prone to the effects of sincerity. Sincere speech aids people to see the truth of an idea that they had till then not believed in, which they would not have tolerated, and which, therefore, they would have opposed and refused to evaluate objectively. It encourages the listener to also think sincerely, as well as to judge and speak sincerely. Compared to one who speaks sincerely, the insincerity of one who makes flowery speeches with much affectation is immediately recognizable. Those who speak sincerely present themselves as they are; they do not attempt to present themselves as good if they are bad, or if they are good to conceal the fact, or to give a different impression of what they are to those around them.
Another characteristic prevalent in the speech of the faithful is their telling the truth no matter what the circumstances. We are told in the Qur’an that avoiding speaking the truth, simply for fear of others, is not acceptable. For this reason, while speaking, the faithful listen to the voice of their conscience. They always speak with the best and most effective words, but, at the same time, do not neglect speaking the truth for fear of disappointing or angering someone, or to win him or her over. They do not fail to speak the truth of concern that the response will have negative repercussions for themselves or their friends. Neither do they tell lies to gain an advantage for themselves or their friends and relatives.
Humility is another important factor in the speech of the faithful. Human beings are truly powerless in the light of the boundless might of Allah. Allah’s knowledge encompasses everything; He is the Creator and the Possessor of everything. For this reason, the believers act with cognizance of the degradation they will suffer when confronted by Allah on the Day of Judgment if they become proud of something that does not truly belong to them. Even in that in which they are outstanding, they humble themselves, acknowledge their deficiencies and speak in recognition of their powerlessness. Even if those they talk to are lacking in the same qualities, Muslims never become arrogant and boastful.
Instead of telling others about their faults and defects to their faces, people of low morality talk instead, behind their backs. These people have no desire to lead others in a better way, or to help them to correct their ways. They plunge into gossip for mundane purposes, such as to pass the time, to degrade the reputation of those they dislike, to belittle and mock them, or to glorify themselves at the expense of others. This vile behaviour is so widespread amongst certain groups of people that they have made gossip a form of entertainment, or even a normal way of life by which they are even found to earn a living. Moreover, this behaviour contributes to a vicious circle; two people get together and gossip about a third, then one of these people gossips with the third person about the other, and later the other two people come together and gossip about the absentee. Nobody points out to anyone else that gossip is wrong, on the contrary, they maintain that it is harmless, that it adds colour to life and provides entertainment to themselves.
Allah notifies people through the Qur’an of the incorrectness of this behaviour; in a verse of the Qur’an, Allah tells us that the gossip of people behind one another’s backs is just as repugnant as “a person eating his brother’s dead flesh”.
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