Everyone wants to be happy throughout their life. One is ready to face despair, but it becomes very difficult to carry on when despair doesn’t seem to go away. This is exactly what is happening with us. We smile because we are forced to smile. Who snatched happiness from us? Who gave us despair? Why are others happy? What is the way to be happy like them? These are some basic questions that haunt us day in and day out. I have been trying to come to a conclusion but to no avail. Nevertheless, I would like to throw some light over the causes of despair.
First is materialism. We only want material things, and for this we can do anything. If, by chance, we fail to get it, we fall into the depths of despair. It is a well-known fact that materialism is a curse when it takes extreme shape. Extreme shape in the sense that the only motive of life becomes materialism and other things take a backseat. Religious and non-religious scriptures abhor the large accumulation of material things. They want you to rise above these things. The main motive of life should be introspection. It is introspection that will prepare the ground for realisation of god. When that happens, a person will feel contented. He will not want more than basic necessities.
Second is that we work against the divine principles. The divinity is clear in declaring that this world is impermanent. It is created for you but you are created for something else. But we have changed this divine rule. We think that we are created for the world and the next world is a mirage. This is a false mentality. If the creator says that this world is not all about happiness but a testing ground for exploring the self, then there is no logic in saying that I am not happy in this world. The foundation of it is sadness and you expect happiness. This paradox won’t allow anyone to live in peace. Until and unless we make peace with the realities of life, there is no hope of getting happiness. So, in order to be happy, we have to open our eyes and ponder over the realities of the world.
Third is imitation. We never live our own lives. It is good to take the best things from others and implement them in life, so that we can live good lives and prepare the ground for the coming generations, but it makes no sense when we go on imitating others blindly. Everyone is free in this world as nature has given us the choice to choose what we want. Nature doesn’t force anyone to do this or that. In fact, it motivates us to do something for ourselves. It is up to us to make the best of our life. Why should I follow others? Yes, I will accept the suggestions of others, but I won’t allow my mind to become habitual of imitation. I will live according to my own brain, heart, body, etc. But if a person goes on living the lives of others, somewhere down the line he will feel suffocated and the clouds of despair will engulf from all sides. That is what is happening with us. We have forgotten ourselves. Our identity is lost. We are living the lives of others. We are physically, mentally, socially and economically slaves to some visible and invisible forces. This mindset should be changed in order to get happiness. We have to start living our lives.
Fourth is pessimism. At the slightest disturbance, we lose all hope and become pessimistic. This attitude is very harmful. Unless and until we go through the darkest tunnels of life, how can we enjoy the brightest days. It is these darkest tunnels that make a personality. But our condition is such that we are not ready to go through this experience. We want ease. And when it doesn’t come, our faces fall and we lapse into despair. Mahesh Bhatt once said that his mentor advised him that the real purpose of life is to live as it comes. You can’t think of things in a vacuum. If you are ready to live, go through this life. Fall down and get up.
The above mentioned things make it clear that for the sake of happiness, there is no magical wand. We have to live our lives according to the divine plan. It is because the divine plan has stood the test of time. Despair won’t last for a long time if the divine plan is followed in letter and spirit. The need of the hour is to find ways to be happy. Let us try to leave pessimism and embrace optimism so that happiness is back in our lives. It leaves us when we don’t know its value. So, value and cherish it as much as you can.
The writer is an author at www.asnaav.com