Sheru’s Salad Offensives

  Some years ago, and for the first time in fourteen years, Sheru forgot his salad. A call from the office reminded him of his duty. Sheru felt ashamed. What would the buchis think? Sheru had to rush. Sheru has written about all aspects of life – the buchis, mostly, their nakhrey, aunties, Roadside Romeos, […]

Facebook Addiction

Sheru is not on Facebook, but a buchi known to him swears by it. Last year, a marriage broker had brought her a decent proposal. Her parents were delighted, but the buchi acted more choosy, and sought the Facebook ID of the proposed prince-charming. This was unexpected even for the broker, a veteran of many matches, […]

Fact Not Fiction

An acquaintance said the other day that Sheru was running out of ideas. He added that Sheru had been serving salads for the past sixteen years and had nothing left to offer now. Sheru was shocked, not because the acquaintance said that Sheru had run out of ideas, but for other reasons. The acquaintance, as his remarks reflected, has been […]

Unani Medicine Works

  Sheru has been insisting that one can marry (commit suicide) only once. He envies people who go for a second marriage. How can they do it? A unani doctor, who is among Sheru’s friends, married for a third time.   Sheru was stunned.   The third wife gave the doctor a tough time. She […]

Benefits Of Being Bey Namazi

  The execution of the then Prime Minister of Pakistan, Zulifkar Ali Bhutto, on April 4, 1979, sparked off a severe reaction across Kashmir. The Jama’t-e-Islami was blamed for the hanging, and what followed has been widely condemned. But within just five to six years, the Chief Martial Law Administrator of Pakistan, General Zia-ul-Haq, who […]

Laut Ke Buddhu Ghar Ko Aaye

  Their kids went berserk that morning. They could not handle them. A verbal duel ensued. They exchanged hot words, and finally he left in his car.  Unfortunately, there was no Muhammad Rafi to sing mein yeh soach kar uskay dar sey utha tha, ki woh roak laygee mana laygee mujhko. He glanced back to take a last look […]

A Buchi’s Dilemmas

The boy had just arrived from London to find himself a suitable match, but wanted to meet the buchi first. This met with no objections, and the girl was taken to a beautician to fashion her brows and shape her lips. Her sister accompanied her to buy a new dress to suit the occasion. The marriage-broker’s […]

Zindagi Zinda Dili Ka Naam Hai

Scientists have changed life. Now they are in the process of changing feelings. An artificial dil, made of plastic has been made, and even tested. Reports in science magazines suggest that the plastic dil will work like the original. But Sheru is worried. What happens to sha’iri (poetry), and phrases like dil dhadakna, dil tootna, […]

Not With Eyes Wide Shut

  Her radiant beauty set off by a pale gold dress, buchi stepped into the restaurant, trying hard not to show deep concern. Uncleji and auntyji in escort sat her at a quiet table for a cup of tea, to calm her nerves, as it were, until brokerji arrived. When the ‘mediator’ came with reports that the other party was at the rendezvous, […]

Multiple Mothers-In-Law

Sheru attended a marriage last week. The wazwan was delicious. Sheru had a hearty meal, and afterwards went to thank the relative who had invited him. She was a bit downcast. Sheru asked why, and the answer saddened Sheru as well. “It has dawned on me right now that the buchi has to live with […]

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