ABID RASHID BABA
A while ago, I wanted to pen-down the hypocrisy of fake feminists and why we always blame men? This is an appropriate time. The piece carried by this esteemed daily on Saturday (09.02.2019) generated a volley of questions about this vicious #MeToo campaign and made me revisit the issue. Here, I offer my rejoinder to this mediocre write-up. The author, with a jaundiced view looked at it though a narrow prism. The respected writer failed to deconstruct what is already in public domain. There was nothing new in it. It could unveil the hidden dirt lying beneath. I am talking about harassment of men by women? You read it right. Men have been/are being abused by women. Why do we shy away from debating this obnoxious reality?
Facebook’s creator admitted having 270 million fake accounts and 48 million fake profiles on Twitter. Anybody writes anything without even meaning it and thus creates an unimaginable mess in real lives. Let me quote few recent examples of fabricating charges of rape and how abuse on men is underreported.
1. The New York Post reported a story of a 19 year old Nikki Yovino who filed a bogus rape complaint against two university football players. She later admitted that she made the charges up. Now she is behind the bars;
2. A 38 year old married man Sachin Mitkari committed suicide in Maharashtra’s Parbhani district when a woman blackmailed him. He was fed up with a woman’s persistent demand for sex, police said in a presser;
3. Recently Adhayan Suman said that he was humiliated for opening up about the physical and emotional abuse he suffered during his relationship with Kangana Ranaut;
4. The Sarvjeet Singh and Jasleen Kaur case shows us how lives can be ruined over media trial;
5. Remember the case of ‘Rohtak brave-hearts’? In Nov 2014, a video went viral on Facebook. The video showed two young sisters beating three young men alleging harassment. The girls were praised by media and called “brave-hearts” while men were called “perverts”. The Haryana govt immediately announced a cash prize of INR 31,000. Anyone speaking for listening to the boys’ side of the story was declared a rape apologist and misogynist. The opinion began to shift as the second video of the duo surfaced on social media. Investigation concluded that they would beat boys, shoot videos, and threaten them either to pay or face the music;
6. A woman from Lakhnawali village in Greater Noida was arrested for blackmailing a man and threatening to implicate him in a false rape case if he didn’t pay Rs 10 lakh to her, NDTV reported on November 6. She was later charged under relevant sections of IPC, SHO Munesh Chauhan said;
7. And, finally back home, last fall, a woman has been found guilty of falsely accusing a man of rape and criminal intimidation by a Kashmir court. The man in contention had refused to marry the woman and in pique she had filed an FIR against him.
These examples of men as victims should be an eye opener that girls threaten/blackmail boys for not marrying them. We have so many #Hetoo stories to share but men always try to hide the shortcomings of women. Men don’t create a mountain out of a molehill. It is easy to get a political mileage by putting your dissenters down through such campaigns. The author seems confused when he writes, “Government is unaware that social life of women is getting worse day by day and this is the main threat to disintegrate the society.”
What is government supposed to do with our social lives? Undoubtedly, sexual assault on females is a reality. But, a parallel hashtag movement should have been promoted to save males from eve’s wrath. Fatwa factories and ekhaps still exist on Facebook. The author is misinformed when he writes, “women are all-time victims and this movement is hope.” I completely disagree. This movement devalued the status of women globally. This campaign created a void in our already tattered social fabric.
Ever since the dawn of mankind, women have complicated relations and #Metoo is the latest bug.
#Metoo holds no water if it doesn’t mention what happened to Mubeena, the bride. It is futile if it doesn’t talk about the cries of Kunan and Pangs of Poshpora. Why aren’t we accommodative to listen to the other side of the story? Men are not to be blamed, always. In her TOI blog, Vinita Nangia brilliantly rebutted this madness that we can’t allow #MeToo to devolve into a mass hysteria against men. “Not all cases are genuine. The problem is that a man is deemed a criminal the moment even one female finger is pointed at him.”
We always try to conceive what west believes is trash. They vomited #MeToo, and we gulped it to invite wrath. This imported idea has robbed us off our originality. After witnessing how #MeToo was misused to draw sadistic pleasure and set personal scores, the architect of #MeToo Tarana Burke admitted that the movement has lost its way. She has observed a cyclical circus of accusations, culpability and indiscretions. She blamed media for latching onto every salacious detail in stories from #MeToo survivors.
Forced marriages, teen-age pregnancy, bride burning, sex rackets, abandoned illegitimate children, suicide and drug abuse are at an increased incidence in Kashmir. These issues are plaguing us. It is high time that we understand what women believe is NOT gospel truth.
Kashmir is as Bill Clinton once called it “the most dangerous place”, naming and shaming people in public may have huge setbacks. Facebook is a graveyard. It buries people. This firestorm has turned out to be a whirlwind hurricane which has send shockwaves and the people named are in trauma. What social media did to Rana Ayub must calm us and clear our confusions. Women hug male friends, feel happy, and cry on their shoulders when they feel sad, stay with them when they feel low. They protect them. Blame the person not the gender. Our colonial minds seriously need to filter whatever is projected and presented to us.
The author is working a Research Associate and can be reached at: email@example.com