Sheru Is Not On Facebook

The other day, a buchi Sheru knows rejected a marriage proposal.

She had a strange reason: the boy had few friends on Facebook.

And made it clear that she would not marry someone who was not social.

In good old days, offers of matrimony used to be rejected on more concrete grounds.

Parents would ascertain material facts about the groom. They would inquire about his mother’s name, and consult soothsayers to see whether stars matched.

Modern buchies, moms and aunties go to the groom’s Facebook profile instead.

The decision by the lady in question took Sheru down memory lane.

During University days, a boy lost his heart to a beautiful face.

After much pursuit and persuasion, the buchi finally reciprocated his feelings. And the pair would often be seen talking beneath a tree, in the varsity gardens.

As it turned out, they had lied to each other about their families and social status.

“I had cold fish and dried rice for dinner last night.”

The girl’s boasting had the desired effect.

So much so that Sheru heard of it the very next day.

“She must have had stale rice and hogaad,” he observed wryly.

Hogaad being dried fish Kashmiris would store for winter.

Modern Kashmiris turn nauseous at the very thought.

Sheru has never considered it a delicacy anyway, and it does smell awful.

But some buchies do like it.

Predictably, Sheru’s conclusions did not go down well with the boy.

But does Sheru care?

Fortunately or unfortunately, the boy and girl got married, and within a couple of months he realized the truth of the cold-rice-and-dried-fish menu.

The girl had provided “misleading information” about her family. He had begun to think that he was marrying into royalty.

The moral of the story: if you can be deceived face-to-face, why not on Facebook?

It applies to both, boys as well as girls.

Incidentally, the buchi with Facebook reservations against prospective matches happens to be a strong Sheru fan.

But does she know that Sheru is not on Facebook?

She has never asked.

She knows that Sheru does not care.